07/30/2013

   Our meeting with the minister of the United Methodist Church went even better than I had hoped . He was very kind and sensitive to our situation. Even though the service was to be in just two days, he took the time to get to know us, counsel us, and find out what kind of person Curtis had been before we got down to discussing the actual service. I thought this was pretty amazing considering that only once had we ever been to a service at his church, and we obviously were not members of his congregation. He was even accepting of the idea to share the officiating duties at the funeral with the minister of our home church. Everything seemed to fall into place including allowing the high school band to perform the music from their fall field show of which Curtis had been a part. It was called "A Day at Disneyland," which was a  perfect way, we felt, to honor our son, since he had actually performed this music with the band and Disneyland was one of his favorite places on earth. I left our meeting with the minister feeling much better about things. It seemed as though everything was now taken care of: the viewing, the funeral, the burial, all the music, the pallbearers, the eulogists, etc. We hoped there wasn't anyone we had neglected to notify. Still, with everything that had been going on, it all seemed so unreal to me. As things had turned out, we would not be able to actually see our son's body until the viewing service the following evening, I was extremely fearful that when that happened I would no longer be able to emotionally deny what was real, and it would all come crashing down on me at once. I did not want to fall apart in front of everyone. I very much felt that I needed to be strong for myself, for my wife, for my surviving children, for the rest of my family, for everyone. It's a guy thing. However, before I would have to face that challenge, we had another obstacle to stand up to the next day-the first of the three funerals for our lost children.